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Planes

 

 

“I hope they don’t cancel the flight.”

Ha. Of course they cancelled the flight. And of course I had my day planned around it not being cancelled and everything going just as I had planned, down to the hour. Arrival, cab ride, grocery getting, sitter arriving, dinner plans.

Ha.

And of course all of those things fed into my schedule for tomorrow. Now we can’t get out until late tomorrow afternoon.

Ha.

There was a time when I’d have come completely unraveled by such a thing. But if there’s anything I’ve learned you can do exactly zero about, it’s weather and air travel. I just wasn’t wise enough to know it’s easier to give in and go with it until, well, maybe today. I would normally grit my teeth through it all and lament having to rearrange my schedule, life, and whatever portion of my brain that deals with these matters.

I told myself at the end of 2017 that I would work on becoming more emotionally healthy and getting my priorities in order instead of making any tangible resolutions for 2018, that my goals to do this thing or that project weren’t as important as learning how to enjoy life along with the doing of life. I don’t know how well it’s going really, but I am actively pursuing working a healthy dose of everything’s gonna be all right into my psyche. I am not wired that way. And I dare say that my myriad anxieties have propelled me into action – necessary and productive action – many times, so I can’t tell you that my list making and worrying hasn’t served me – it’s not all wasted energy and walking around obsessively rubbing my hands together. But I’m trying to get it all in better perspective so that I don’t end up wishing I’d enjoyed my life more when I look up and find my days in short supply (and who knows when that will be). There are already probably more behind me than there are ahead.

After I hung up with the airline, I rescheduled what I needed to reschedule, and thought about all of the ways that leaving tomorrow is really better than leaving today. Because why shouldn’t I do that? I’m grounded here either way, and this day will pass whether I’m fretting about something or not. I’d prefer to not. There’s nothing I can do about planes, but there is something I can do about me.

 

Happy Monday and happy travels,

AM